Choosing the Best Lube
A Sticky, Slippery Situation: Choosing the Best Lube for Your Chastity Cage
Chastity is not intended to be comfortable.
As any man locked in chastity can tell you, it’s not always an easy life to lead. You experience discomfort, and possibly even pain, with each day of lockup, each denied or ruined orgasm, each tease and taunt. And yet you love your male chastity life – and one of the main reasons that you love it is that your keyholder, your Master or Mistress, always knows what’s best for you and will always take care of you.
Your life in chastity might not be comfortable, but it will never be harmful. It will never be scary. Your keyholder will do his or her best to make sure that you stay safe and healthy at all times.
And one of the best ways that they can do that is by using lots and lots of lubricant, aka lube.
Why Use Lube in Chastity?
Lube can make the process of putting on a cock cage much, much easier and more comfortable. The cock and balls are very sensitive areas of the body, and it often (especially if you are not circumcised) has a lot of loose skin which can stretch, pinch or get caught on the material of the cage. Even a little bit of lube greatly minimizes the risk of such damage occurring.
Using lube can also greatly help your cock and balls become accustomed to the feeling of a new cage more quickly. Whether you are wearing a chastity cage for the very first time or have recently moved to a smaller size after your cock has permanently shrunk (in which case, we congratulate you on your accomplishment!) it takes time to get used to feeling the material around your cock or the ring pressed snugly against your balls. Lube will accelerate this process and help your sensitive cock get used to its new home faster than ever!
When Should I Use Lube?
The short, if not entirely helpful answer is this: whenever you need to use it.
The longer answer is that the occasions and amount of time when lube is needed can vary significantly from person to person. Some people only need to use lube the first time they put on a chastity cage, while others prefer to keep their cock slicked for several weeks as an adjustment period. Still others keep themselves lubed up whenever they are locked up, no matter how many years they have been engaging in chastity play.
The most important thing to remember is that your personal lube needs are YOURS and yours alone. It does not ever help to compare yourself to anyone else – even if you have other friends or partners who are locked up in chastity just like you. It does not make you “lesser” if you need lube more often, and forgoing it does not make you “tougher”.
This is an important reminder because, unfortunately, so many sexually active people, especially men, operate under the mistaken belief that needing lube is “sissy” and makes them “weak”. Lube is a helpful sexual product which helps keep participants safe, healthy and feeling amazing!
So chastity slaves, NEVER feel ashamed to speak up if you feel you need to use lube with any of your cages, rings, or other chastity devices. And keyholders, listen to your subs – if he asks for lube, USE it. There are lots of great ways to introduce pain and discomfort into your sexual play if that’s what you are into, but skipping out on the lube can cause permanent damage to sensitive areas of the body and is therefore definitely NOT one of them.
What Lube Should I Use?
Now we come to what is probably the central question of this helpful article – what type of lube is best to use in your male chastity play?
And, like so many questions about sex, the answer is not a simple one. In fact, there are several types of lube currently available on the market. Lube can be purchased online, at sex toy shops, and even sometimes at pharmacies or “general merchandise” stores such as Wal-Mart. There are also several substances not officially sold as a sexual lubricant which are, despite this fact, widely used as one by couples all around the world.
The best answer would likely be this: each type of lube is recommended in some sexual situations, but may not be recommended in others.
Does that answer seem confusing? Don’t worry. We’re here to help! Below, we’ve provided a brief overview of the pros and cons of each of the most common types of lube. We’ve also taken special care to highlight which lubes work best for chastity-related play and which should be avoided.
An “unofficial lube” is any product which is not specifically manufactured with the purpose of being a sexual lubricant, but is used as one regardless. Any type of product can become an unofficial lube if even one person uses it for sex. However, some of the most commonly seen unofficial lubes include: baby oil, olive oil, and hand, body or facial lotion.
Here at Lock the Cock, our personal belief is that it is usually best to avoid such “do-it-yourself” options and instead purchase an official, specifically manufactured lubricant. We find that baby oil and similar options tend not to last as long as “official lube” and can leave sticky residues that are devilishly hard to clean off.
In addition, most of these products, especially lotions, are scented, and using them with cock cages or other sex toys tends to result in the scent “sticking” to the toy, sometimes for weeks at a time. So if you don’t want your cock cage smelling like flowers or vanilla, stay away from “DIY” lubes!
If, for whatever reason, you cannot find any official lube that works for you and are forced to turn to more unique options, we recommend choosing a thicker substance, such as baby oil gel. When lubricating your cock cage, avoid thinner, “waterier” substances such as olive oil. In addition, always thoroughly read the list of ingredients of every product to keep an eye out for potential allergens such as nuts and fruits.
Water-based lubricants, sometimes also called aqua-lubes, are the largest category of lubricants currently available. (This is because they were the first type of lube invented and thus the first to be sold period as well as the first to appear on the shelves of larger, not specifically sex-focused stores.) The popularity of water-based lubes is easy to see: they are typically affordable in price, usually hypoallergenic, and best of all can be safely used with practically any sex toy.
These lubes are extremely useful for a wide range of sexual practices. They are particularly excellent for vaginal penetration, as the vagina is naturally self-lubricating and often does not require much outside assistance in order to become sufficiently slick. Water-based lubricant can also be used to spice up an oral sex or manual stimulation session, or even add a unique twist to the occasional solo or mutual masturbation session!
However, lubes with a water base are not recommended for anal intercourse, as they are usually too thin to effectively prevent damage such as tearing. In addition, we must make the unfortunate announcement that lubes of this type are not recommended to use with your chastity device.
Why is this, you might ask? You just listed all these amazing uses for water-based lubes, so what’s so different about cock cages?
Well, one of the key properties of water-based lube is that it is easily absorbed by the skin. This means that the lube will essentially “clean itself up” over time. Sometimes, this is nice, as it will remove the necessity for a lengthy clean-up period following sexual play.
However, in the case of cock cages, the water-based lube will dry up too quickly to be effective, leaving you far too soon with the painful friction that comes from an un-lubed cage rubbing against your sensitive flesh. Some chaste men have even reported that water-based lube dries before they have even finished putting on their cage!
So, while water-based lube may be handy to have around due to its varied utility in a number of sexual situations, you should avoid using it to lube up your chastity cage due to its short lifespan.
Oil-based lubricants were initially created and marketed as a natural alternative for those who did not enjoy using chemical lubes or had allergies to certain chemicals. They are typically made from naturally occurring oils derived from fruits, nuts or flowers. Commonly found ingredients include sunflower oil, coconut oil, and shea butter. They are primarily hypoallergenic, but individuals with fruit or nut allergies should consult a doctor before use. However, a few less “all-natural” oil-based lubes can occasionally be found, usually derived from petroleum and often marketed as “petroleum jelly”.
A lubricant derived from oil will typically be thicker and longer-lasting than one made from water. Its consistency will be more like that of a gel or butter than a runny liquid. (For a quick visual example, think of water-based lube as apple juice and oil-based lube as apple jam.) For this reason, it is commonly recommended for anal sex and prostate massaging or milking, as its superior thickness will keep you or your partner’s butt safe and healthy. (If you’re not sure what prostate milking is, go here and here to learn more!)
Some people find that they are safely able to use oil-based lubricant with sex toys – especially extra-large ones which might require that little extra bit of slickness and glide. However, some kinksters have noticed that regular use of oil-based lube with the same toy over time causes some degradation and decrease in the toy’s quality.
Over an extended period, the ingredients in many oil-based lubes can break down silicone toys and remove the finish on stainless steel ones. Therefore, you should test out oil-based lubes on your toys when they are not in or on you to observe if any such reaction occurs.
However, it is important to note that there is one type of material which should never be allowed to come into contact with oil based lube: LATEX. Oil-based lube can quickly break down latex, creating rips, tears and distinctly un-erotic holes in your favorite sexy gloves or your slick latex catsuit. You should ESPECIALLY avoid pairing oil-based lubes with latex condoms, as they can create holes which defeat the purpose of the condom entirely.
All that being said, you’re probably asking, do we recommend this type of lube for use with male chastity cages?
Our answer is slightly less simple than in the above section. By and large, we do not recommend oil-based lubes for use with your chastity device. However, as we do know some chastity practitioners who have successfully used and enjoyed these types of lube, we acknowledge that it is primarily a matter of individual taste.
The primary reason why we do not recommend oil-based lube for use with cock cages is the one discussed above: that it can cause degradation over time. Your sleek, shiny stainless steel cage may become rough and ragged looking after only a few months or even weeks of regular wear. Given that a major function of a cock cage is to create an aesthetically appealing, erotic image for the Master or Mistress who holds your keys, this is definitely not a desired outcome.
In addition, because oil-based lube is not absorbed by the skin, it will require frequent, regular cleaning. Leaving the lube on your skin for too long can lead to a buildup of bacteria which could possibly cause long-term health conditions such as irritation, tenderness, and even swelling and pain on or around the penis and testicles. Some men also feel that the lube leaves a sticky, uncomfortable-feeling residue on and around the cock after only a day or two of use.
It is recommended that you clean the lubricant off your skin every 2-3 days. However, this can be an extremely difficult task to perform without removing your cock cage. You can use tools such as cotton balls or Q-tips to help; however, especially if you have the type of cage which fully encases your cock, it can be difficult to ensure you have successfully removed every bit of lubricant. (And, of course, it’s highly unlikely your keyholder would be happy with having to unlock you every couple of days to clean yourself off!)
In conclusion, oil-based lube may work for some people but not for others. Our number one tip is always to test it out with any sex toys or tools, including cock cages, before use, and to clean regularly and thoroughly if you do decide that oil-based lube is right for you.
The last of the three commonly used lube types are the silicone-based lubricants. Silicone is a synthetic substance which has gained popularity for both its smooth texture and its durability. Many lube enthusiasts consider silicone-based lubes to occupy the “middle ground” between oil and water – they are thicker, slicker and longer-lasting than water-based lubes but do not last as long and do not require quite so frequent cleanings when compared to lubes derived from natural oils.
Here at Lock the Cock, we absolutely love silicone lubes. They are our number one choice when it comes to choosing a lube to pair with your favorite chastity device!
Just what’s so great about silicone-based lubes? Well, first of all, they have the same thick, gel-like consistency which oil-based lubes initially made popular. You can use them on your cock, balls, ass, prostate, and pretty much anywhere else you could imagine without any risk of pain or injury.
However, while they have the thickness associated with oil-based lubes, they are significantly easier to clean. A simple washing with hot water and regular soap will quickly and easily remove any trace of lube from your skin. This means that lube can be regularly cleaned from your cock without needing to remove your chastity device. Just take a thorough shower and you’re completely clean, with no risk of bacteria build-up potentially causing infection.
Silicone-based lubes are also compatible with a wide variety of sex toys, including most of our popular cock cage models. In particular, stainless steel cock cages will retain their highly polished, shiny finish for years and years without any risk of degrading or breaking down.
There is one important consideration to keep in mind when choosing a silicone-based lube over one of the other options mentioned in this guide. In some cases, silicone-based lubes have been known to react negatively with toys that are themselves made from silicone. Regular exposure to this type of lube might cause silicone toys to break down or degrade in a manner similar to oil-based lubes. As with all new lubricants, we recommend testing out silicone-based lubes by exposing them to the toy or chastity device BEFORE it is on or in your body.
So if you’re unsure of what type of lube to pair with your chastity cage, we fully recommend starting with a silicone-based product. Long-lasting, easy to clean and use, comfortable and safe, hypoallergenic, and best of all, it’s so effective, you should only need to use a little bit at a time! As an added bonus, silicone-based lube simply feels good when it comes in contact with your sensitive flesh. You can even use it to give your keyholder sensuous massages – we find that’s a great way to convince him or her to knock some time off of your next lock-up!
As with any sex-themed product, there are many different varieties of lube beyond the three common examples listed above. In particular, there are many types of lube which offer various ways of enhancing the pleasure you experience during sexual play.
If we mentioned every possible lube variation in this article, we would be here all day. So we’re going to stick to mentioning one which might work well with your favorite cock cage, and one which should probably be kept away.
Desensitizing or numbing lubes use an ingredient called lidocaine to decrease the amount of sensation experienced by any part of your body you rub it on. It is commonly used to decrease pain and discomfort during sexual acts such as anal penetration or the use of particularly large toys in any hole at all.
If you are putting on a cock cage for the first time or are otherwise new to the male chastity lifestyle, you may want to consider a numbing lube at first. It will help the sensitive skin of your cock and balls get used to their imprisonment without any pain, tenderness or discomfort. We do not recommend permanent or long term use of numbing lube, but, for short term painful situations, its effectiveness is unequaled.
Of course, a keyholder might also use numbing lube as a clever way to punish a disobedient chastity slave – use it to decrease the amount of pleasure he experiences during one of your rare play sessions with an unlocked cock. It’ll leave him more frustrated than ever!
On the other hand, warming lubes, as the name suggests, are meant to create a pleasant, warm sensation against your skin. Many couples enjoy using such lubes during a wide variety of sexual play, as they find that it adds to the experienced pleasure significantly. If you or your keyholder enjoy warming lube, by all means feel free to use it during any and all sexual activities!
HOWEVER, you should avoid using warming lubes when putting on and wearing your cock cage. They can cause the temperature of your cage to rise along with the temperature of your skin. If you are wearing one of our stainless steel models, this can result in your cage becoming uncomfortably hot and perhaps even burning the sensitive flesh of your poor caged cock.
As for other types of lube, we recommend frequent experimentation! From scented lubes to flavored ones, go ahead and try out absolutely anything that catches your interest! Of course, stick to our recommendations for lubes to use on your chastity cage, but any of the above suggestions and examples could be used to enhance your service to your Mistress or Master and give them even greater pleasure!
Some Quick (and Slick) Tips for Lubing Up Your Cock Cage
As we mentioned earlier in this article, using lube is by and large a unique experience that will vary from person to person. How much lube you need to apply, when and for what sexual acts you need it, all of these are things you will need to figure out for yourself.
However, we can offer you a few quick Lock the Cock Pro Tips to help make lubing up your cock cage and keeping it clean and slick easier than ever!
- When applying lube, don’t forget the rings. Many male chastity fans make the mistake of lubing up only the body of the cage itself, and forgetting the rings that go over the base of the cock and around the balls. As these are also areas with a lot of sensitive skin, make sure not to neglect them!
- If you will be using lube regularly, such as when getting adjusted to a new cock cage, shower no less often than every 2 days to avoid the potential buildup of bacteria. When you remove your cage for cleaning sessions, check for any problems such as redness, tenderness, or swelling on or around the penis.
- Use cotton balls, Q-tips, or even small, soft sponges such as those used to apply makeup. These can help both in applying lube and removing it. You will be able to easily reach inside every cranny and crevice of your cock cage!
- If the lube feels cold and uncomfortable on your cock or cage, you can warm it up before application. Put a small amount of lube in the palm of your hands and rub your hands together until the lube has reached approximately room temperature. This will eliminate any potential uncomfortable cold sensations, especially if you are using a stainless steel cock cage!
Like we said at the beginning of this article, male chastity isn’t always comfortable. After all, it’s not really supposed to be. However, with the careful application of the proper lube, you can make sure that the discomfort never reaches a point that will leave you or your keyholder feeling frustrated or dissatisfied with your sexual lifestyle. With lube, you’ll stay safe, healthy, and happy – not to mention slick! – throughout years and years of male chastity play!